Personalised vows

There’s something pretty special about hearing two people make promises to each other in their own words. It’s personal, it’s meaningful, and when done well, it can be one of the loveliest moments of your wedding ceremony.

But if the thought of writing your own vows has you staring at a blank page wondering where on earth to begin, you’re very much not alone. Let’s talk about how to make it personal, meaningful and, most importantly, completely you.

Your vows, your way

First things first, there is no perfect way to write wedding vows. They don’t need to sound like a romantic novel, a Hollywood film or somebody else’s idea of what love should look like.

Maybe you’re hopeless romantics who wear your hearts on your sleeves. Maybe your relationship is built on laughter, terrible jokes and winding each other up. Perhaps you’re a little more private and prefer to keep things simple. All of that is absolutely fine.

The best vows reflect the relationship you actually have. Think about what you love about your partner, the little things that make you smile, what you’ve been through together and the promises you genuinely want to make for the future. You don’t need grand declarations or complicated words.

Sometimes, the simplest promises mean the most.

And please don’t feel you have to make your vows funny, emotional or particularly poetic just because you’ve heard somebody else’s wedding vows and loved them. This isn’t a competition. It’s about telling your person what they mean to you.

Where do you even begin?

Give yourself a little time and space to think. Put the wedding checklist aside, take a breath and remember why you’re getting married in the first place. Your vows deserve a little more attention than a last-minute scribble the night before the wedding.

Start with your relationship rather than trying to find the perfect opening sentence. Think about your favourite memories, what you admire about each other, how your lives have changed since you met and what you want your future together to look like.

You don’t need to include your entire love story, every inside joke or a list of everything your partner does that drives you mad. Although, depending on your relationship, a carefully chosen reference to the dishwasher might get a laugh!

Keep your words personal, sincere and comfortable to say aloud. Remember, you’ll be sharing them in front of your favourite people, so think about what you’re happy to share publicly and what you’d prefer to keep just between the two of you.

Most importantly, don’t put pressure on yourself to get everything perfect. Your vows are a promise, not a performance. A little wobble in your voice, a burst of laughter or a tear or two won’t spoil the moment. They might just make it even more memorable.

Need a little help? That’s what I’m here for.

Here’s something I always want my couples to know: you don’t have to write your own vows to have a personal wedding ceremony.

Your ceremony will already be thoughtfully written  around your story, your relationship and the things that make you who you are. Writing your own vows is an option, not another wedding task you have to squeeze into an already busy life.

If you love the idea but don’t know where to start, I can help you find the words. If you’ve written something but it doesn’t quite sound right, we can work on it together. And if you’d rather leave the vow writing to me, we can talk about the promises you want to make and create something that feels natural, meaningful and true to you.

There is no one-size-fits-all approach here. Some couples write their vows independently, others like to agree on a similar style and length, and some prefer to keep their words a complete surprise until the wedding day.

We’ll work out what suits you both, without adding unnecessary pressure or making the process more complicated than it needs to be.

Not sure where to start? 

That’s absolutely fine. Tell me what you’re thinking, what you’re hoping for and what feels a little daunting. We’ll have a proper chat and find an approach that feels right for you both.

Maria x